Express Thanks

By definition, expressing our thankfulness as we focus on the present moment, on appreciating our lives as it is today and what has made it so. There are a multitude of things that have happened in my lifetime that I am thankful for. I am thankful for the wonderful and loving parents I was blessed with. I had two wonderful brothers who were 11 and 9 when I was born. I remember this story with Scott the youngest of the two. I was probably about 4 or 5 at the time, I didn't understand that he had homework and couldn't play with me. So, I told him that Mama would buy me some homework. I thought their purpose in life was to play with their baby sister. The oldest, Mike passed away years before he should have. I have always thought that things happened for a reason. But, I have been tested with that after Mike died. Losing a sibling is much harder than losing a parent. You expect to bury your parents but you don't expect to bury a sibling at 36. My dad owned his own business until I was about 13. We were what most people would have considered "well to do" back then. I was teased mercifully about that growing up. My mom drove a white Mercedes Coupe back in the 1980's so it was hard to fight that back then. I can remember at Christmas asking my dad for money for presents. It was nothing for him to pull out $300 and give to me. But, I didn't understand what that meant. Money had no value to me at 12. I think everybody thought I was this spoiled brat, that got everything she wished for. Looking back, I don't think I was spoiled. I have always been overweight and I had a cousin tell me that if she had parents like mine that could afford all these clothes for her, she would lose weight. She just couldn't understand why I wouldn't do whatever in my power to lose the weight and get good clothes. The reason....the clothes and the money didn't matter to me. The fact that my family loved me was enough.

Dream

Dream....what do you dream of? Do you dream of a better career? Do you dream of a better life? There are a lot of things that I would like to accomplish in my life. But, the one thing that I have always dreamed and aspired to be is a writer. I have decided at the ripe old age of 42 to give it a try. I may never get published but I am going for the gusto to see my dream through.

Count Your Blessings

Do you remember to count your blessings? I try so hard to remember to count mine on a daily basis. Even with DeWayne on dialysis, I try so hard to remind myself that things could be so much worse. This June, DeWayne will have been back on dialysis for four years. He's only had one hospital admission during that time. Last June when he was in the hospital with the peritonitis, Dr. Boorgu told him that most patients have a bout with this particular infection within the first 18 months. DeWayne had made it 36 months before getting it...so I count that as a huge blessing. I remember when DeWayne had to go to UAB for his regular doctors visit, we would always be reminded how blessed we were. There were always tons of patients much worse off than DeWayne ever has been. We should always remember....there is ALWAYS someone much worse off than ourselves.

Be Kind

Be Kind.....I've always thought it was easier to not be kind. You have to make a conscious effort to say something nice to other people. That kind and uplifting comment that you could make to your spouse, sibling, parent, coworker or just the person you pass on the street...we never know how much that means to the other person. We have no idea what kind of an impact we can make on others lives. In that effort to reach out to another person and to share just that human connection...that's what it's all about to me.

Accept Differences

Accepting Differences....to accept our choice to be different from others. I think a lot of people find me to be anti-social. That's not always the case. I tend to find with the life experiences that I have had over the years, they  have impacted me more than I even realize. I don't have the tolerance with the petty and drama that people seem to surround themselves with. I lost my dad to lung cancer when I was 28 years old. I lost my oldest brother to complications of kidney failure when I was 35 years old. When you've been through a personal tragedy such as death, it changes you more than you realize. For those who've never experienced the loss of a loved one, you are the lucky few.